Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Mindy Kaling is my hero, and other news

Bummed about missing NY Fashion Week? I sure am. There's nothing that sounds like more fun than cramming into a crowded room at the Lincoln Center, standing in the way-way-way back because you write for your own blog, not for Vogue (even if you wrote for Vogue, you'd probably still be in the back-ish because your name is not Suri Cruise) to watch the gazelles strut their stuff in feathers, sequins and scary-high heels.

What, that doesn't sound like a good time to you? Are you kidding me?

I've never been to an official Fashion Week show before. I've worked backstage on smaller-scale stuff, having once aspired to be an editorial assistant (ok, I still kind of aspire to that). Basically I was Whitney on the Hills before she moved to the City, except I didn't intern at Teen Vogue. [Hmm, what's with the Vogue brand getting all these shout-outs from me today? Yeesh, you'd think they paid me or something. By the way, see their eensy-weensy ad somewhere on this page if you'd like a subscription. :P].

But I digress.

I used to follow various fashion weeks religiously and blog them for both Ip & Audrey and a site called Green Cotton, where I would try to cover the "green" angle. In mainstream fashion, that was tough. Despite all the knowledge out there about sustainable fabrics, why they're better than conventional ones, and why everything else really sucks for the environment, designers still use nasty chemically-processed textiles and cheap labor to fashion their wares. And that's a bummer, but hey, clothes are pretty. 

Back when I blogged more extensively, I was either working part-time retail jobs (I used to work at Borders, Ann Taylor and as a writer/assistant for an independent online fashion retailer) and freelance writing or working nine to fives that allowed me plenty of free time to blog (and 'journalize' for local papers) at night. Then last year, I landed a full-time news reporting job, and as I've said many times, just got too darn busy to keep up with the fashion world. I'm much more focused on the happenings in local government these days, but I definitely miss fashion. It's fun and frivolous, sure, but we all need a little frivolity now and then, don't we?

That's why I love the hilarious contributions from Mindy Kaling over the past week, who tweeted on Fashion Week in abstentia. Her fantasy version of events seems way more fun than actually attending NYFW in real life. Here are a few of my favorite tweets:

Was late to Alexander Wang bc couldn't drag Adrien Brody out of bed at Trump Soho. Fearne Cotton put her backpack on my seat, tho yay

 At Y-3, Joseph Gordon Leavitt asked who made my bra. "they're bespoke, of course." "Huh?" he responded, unable to hear over the din.

Great, nearly blinded by a rhinestone flung off a gown at Jenny Packham. Adrien and I now at Columbia Presbyterian.

Took off heels and pretended to be Malia Obama to sit front row at Prabal Gurung. It worked until Tavi & Anderson Cooper ratted me out

. ummmm.... I wasn't at any fashion show. think you mistook some other pale grey haired guy for me. Probably Tim Gunn 

Is this a joke? Ryan Lochte is sitting in my seat at Tory Burch! Texted Ronan Farrow about it, he was giving a symposium or something

Aziz Anari got in on the fake tweeting, too:

  got you & Skaarsgard on list for Alex Wang party. Secret location is Whole Foods on Bowery (VIP area: frozen foods.)

Seriously, what would we do without comedians to provide hilarious faux-insider fake fashion week tweets? The world truly is an inspiring place.

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