Because
THIS is coming to my mailbox:
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I mean, really. My 'rents already think I've gone off the deep end with this whole "fashion writer" thing. Receiving a magazine with a barely-clad ScarJo cover complete with scintillating headlines does not help matters. Thanks a lot,
Glamour!
Now I wouldn't call myself a prude, but this mag is just
EMBARRASSING! I'm talking
Seventeen trauma-rama bad! It may not be very modern of me to say so, but 99.9% of the time, I think it's better to follow a more conservative route. Why? Perhaps because I'm a pastor's daughter. I like fashion and all, but when my beloved glossies decide to go the tarty route, I'm not afraid to get all Jane Austen up in their business. Word.*
I suppose this is why I'm not a huge Scarlett Johansson fan... because most of the time she represents herself as a bat-'er-eyes, voluptous vixen. Yes, ScarJo, you're gorgeous. You've got the perfect figure and can do any hair color. We get it, okay? Stop rubbing your wannabe Ann Margaret-ness in our faces already. Yeesh.
That said, is it bad that I'm secretly curious to hear her latest musical endeavor? Only because it involves Pete Yorn. I dug She & Him, so I might have to give these tunes a spin. Maybe.
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Happy now,
Glamour? I'm intrigued. But good luck beating this:
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Maybe I prefer Zooey because she, well, prefers wearing
clothes. If only Zooey had been Glamour's cover choice (perhaps in a whimsical alterna-fantasy world, where everyone would sport charming vintage frocks and sip tea atop their bicycle/roller skates of choice. And we'd all sing "Xanadu." Of course). I jumped for joy when this hit my mailbox a few months back:
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This cover is so sweet, fresh, and girlie without being cheesy. Obviously this was part of Zooey's promotion for
500 Days of Summer, and most likely resulted in thousands more flocking to theaters to catch that quirky indie darling. This cover is the perfect marketing tool that paints Deschanel as the ingenue she is. And that coral-hued dress with matching Repetto flats?
Self isn't even a fashion mag, but it clearly has a far superior styling squad here. Sorry,
Glamour. You got schooled. (And it's not the first time! Yawn fest).
So. Have any of you heard Zooey or ScarJo's music? In a Zooey vs. Scarlett face-off, who wins? Do let me know what you think. I'd do another spiffy poll, as the last one was a rousing (wee!) success, but I'm too lazy. Oh, and have you ever received a blush-worthy magazine in the mail that you wanted to hide before your parentals/flatmates/neighbors/cat could see? Feel free to sound off in the comments, loves.
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And if you watched
The Hills or
The City last night and laughed your butt off (or cried tears of joy.... or anguish)... well, I wanna know that, too. :)
*And perhaps I've erred by drawing unnecessary attention to this tacky cover. That's the journalist in me wanting to "seek truth and report it," I guess. Or, in this case, expose things. Nevertheless, I'm bothered, and usually when I'm bothered, I share. And then you share, too, and we all share something deep and meaningful and weep and laugh and become the best of friends. Or not. I don't really know. All I know is it's early morning and I need to make coffee. :P